Wishing UpON a sTAR
oh well.. excellent. just as i wan to click post and going to sleep. everything was deleted. how encouraging. jus as when i wan to post an encouraging blog to everyone. hahaha..
nvm, will try to recall everything i typed just now.
ok, one big news to share was that apparently Dr adrian lee received many responses regarding to the cheating. so he was quite disheartened and disappointed with the students. he thanked me for informing him and that we are going to have a RE-TEST on next friday. felt a sense of relief on tuesday night. i wasn't very very happy or jumping in joy kind. i just feel that.. woah~ finally.. i was right... i was so upset last week. it was as though nobody siding me (there were la. but then..), and dr adrian lee's reply about NO cheating made me feel even lousier. like i did a mistake in reporting. like i shouldn't do that. like i was one against so many people. i felt kind of helpless then.
Phew~ finally it's OVER!
next was, as i was reading my friend's blog just now. i found it amazingly familiar. anyway, she was saying that she had worked hard, but grade didn't show. and she's quite upset over it. it strikes me that it happened to me before. it happened to me last sem, i scored a C for my programming. i've always been a consistent worker. and i did put in alot of effort in this module. at least most of my effort were drained into this stupid module. and i tot i did ok for the final exam. BUT when i got the result slip, i was shocked! coz my cap was dropped. and tt ugly C was like glaring at me. damn it. hahaha.. and i scored the lowest among ALL my friends. how super discouraging.
i didn't understand why this whole shit happened to me. i mean, i'd put in my hard work! well.. didn't i work hard enough? was it not enough? i asked myself again and again. perhaps, hard work dun always equivalent to result. perhaps i din put in enough hard work.. perhaps i employed the wrong method to study.. perhaps.. perhaps...
i kept thinking and thinking. but it was all USELESS. coz' i couldn't reverse the whole shit! it's not like as though i can re-take this sem and try to score better again this sem! and it's not like i can have one more exam to even out the lousy score. C was it. it was FINAL. and nothing can be done.
and now, i understand. God let me experience it then, so i can understand how some of you all feel and share my experience with you.
Look! it was just a test. it was not the final grade. You still got time to do something about it. If you will to give up now, nothing will change n things get worse. In life, we will face tests, problems and troubles. No point avoiding and pretending tt it's NOT there. Face the trials happily, conquer it with perseverence. Imagine this- so u scored a low score, and u were very sad about it. so u decided to give up. and when ur result come, you were horrified to see ur grade, then u became sad again. and when u looked back, chanced upon the result slip, u saw the grade, u became sad again. SEE! WAT A VICIOUS CYCLE tt haunt ur whole LIFE! hahah.. bad bad bad.
my point is. Do something, i am sure that's NOT YOU! do sth, so u won't regret in the future!! i am sure u wan to be confident, happy woman, and when u look back, u can tell you kids that, "see mama last time result very bad, but i didn't give up. i worked up and left everything to Lord to decide if i deserve it. i guess i did." then u smile happily to them! SEE! wat a sweet, touching scene. ahhaha
Thus,
you've been doing really well! jus continue to...
Stay happy. Stay focus. remain true to urself!
"Blessed is the man who persevere under trials, because when he has stood the test, he will receie the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him."- James 1:12
Crown of life refering to the reward and gift from God. The glory, the honor, the peace, happiness and gratitude for you who had faced the trials from Lord. ^_^
God is trying to make us into a person who look into mirror and say, "I like you." and want to be you. ^_^
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11:37 PM.
