Wishing UpON a sTAR
Went to dinner with pen, Qin and Mrs Yeo last night. We had really delicious food! We ate at the new restaurant opposite yoshinoya. (not exactly new.. but well.. CONSIDERED NEW LA)Anyway, besides all the wonderful food we had, we had a long conversation. and suddenly, I felt that pen looks so old and experienced... as though he experienced many hardships. And yes, suddenly, I feel so fortunate.... and naive at the same time....
Realized that pen is afterall, a troubled kid. He is only 20.. yet, he is old in his heart. HE just gave himself so much pressure, and so many burdens to bear... He refused to give himself a break.. and he ended up hurting himself.. and I feel that he is in self-denial too.. he insisted that he's fine, and that he dun usually think alot. WHICH ARE ENTIRELY not true. He is not fine at all. In fact, he is quite bad. Though HE has many problems, he refused to share. He claimed that he seldom uses his brain. BUT the fact is that, he usually his brain too much~ and he focus on negative thoughts! And he just simply closes his heart, hiding behind somewhere.. out there..
I miss the old pencheng. As in really! He was so playful, and naughty. I remember clearly that he used to be soaking wet most of the times... from all the running and playing of course. He was so super playful. He liked to pull my hair and bully me.. and well.. I remember that I slapped his face once. First time and the only time, i slapped a guy that is. All he said was "ta ma de". And I cried immediately after i slapped him. As the result, he got scolded from mr Lim for making me cry. Hahaha... funny, right? Hmmm.. but couldn't blame me then. At that time, my mom was hospitalized and had an operation. I was worried for her. And yes, I felt VERY offended whenever ppl scolded vulgarities at me against her. Interesting childhood story. haha
Oh, and guess wat, he used to have a crush on me when we were in primary school. Amazing har? Haha... he gave me such a wonderful childhood.. he gave me great memory.. if not because of him in primary school day, my life won't be this wonderful and painted with colours.. comparing to my pri school life in hk was like nothing. it was almost covered with black paints.. and i can't recollect much of the happy past.. but in singapore is different.. they gave me hopes, and friendship i yearn for...
Thanks pen, qinru, etc.. and of course, great teachers like mr chu, mr lim and mrs yeo..
And well.. those days were gone.. and he indeed becomes a changed man. He becomes so haggard... so lost.. so tired from all the assumed responsibilities he bears... I seriously pity him... i wan to help him.. but i dunno how..
may my happy childhood memory stays in my mind forever..
and so are the sweet moments in sec sch and jc..
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5:15 AM.
