Wishing UpON a sTAR
maybe we aren't supposed to be together.. maybe i'm not the one.. and u're not mine...
it hurts when u unable to meet me.. it hurts when u didn't do something u promised to.. it hurts when u ignore my feelings again and again, repeatedly... making my recovered wound to split wide open again and again..
yesterday was a great day..
i went to office, provaked a guy in my office.. he gave me a stare and then on, he dao me forever. i am sorry.. i din mean to laugh tt loud.. i was trying to be funny yesterday.. it's been really long since i laughed my heart out.. these few days were like hell... so it was really my fault.. coz' i laughed and made fun of him...
then eugene going to have dinner in his church..
sam went out with dawn without inviting me.. and i heard about it when sam was telling a guy fren tt she'll be meeting dawn later.. wat are frens for.. to think tt dawn kept saying i am her buddy and stuff...
so i decided to go home.. and the best thing was i didn't bring keys.. and nobody's home... so i walked and walked and walked around for 3 hours.. i sms to whom i considered really good friends, whom knows about the problem between me and eugene.... but none replied..
i've been so strong to everyone.. i never really cried in front of ppl.. except becoz' of GP.. and acted strong. act as though nothing has happened. i laugh out loud, i make stupid comments, i do stupid things, thinking tt everything is RIGHT. doing stuffs to make myself strong.. look as though i dun care, dun bother.. and finally, last night.. when i was all alone, i broke down..
and when all these shits happened.. and i cried even harder.. i cried and cried all the way home.. and some finally replied.. but obviously they weren't free for me... they all seemed occupied.. so i walked from sengkang back to my hse for about 1 hrs plus... everything can go wrong just goes wrong yesterday. nothing was right.
my heart is like breaking.. till now, it still hurt.. and my eyes sting again..
idiotic.. wat are friends for...
nevertheless, gotta thank robin for helping me pacify alan... and alan forgave me..
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9:15 PM.
